Are you cheating on me?

The Nuclear crisis in Japan is beginning to make me feel like a jilted lover: all the signs of the terrible truth are clearly evident, but no matter how many times we beg for it, our need for clarity is sidestepped by a practiced swindle.

Many of us are sadly familiar with the gut wrenching sensation of knowing we are being deceived. The difference is that when your significant other determines to bang your best friend behind your back, you're not likely to develop cancer or give birth to genetically altered offspring.

For days the Japanese people and the rest of the world's citizens have been delivered an infinite loop of rickety reassurances from the Japanese Government and those in charge of the Fukushima Nuclear plants. "Oh baby, it was just a partial meltdown, I didn't even get my fuel rod out...". Though we're all certain we've been suckered we passively accept what we're sold in the hope that what we know to be true is truly impossible.

The fact is, you don't need to find strange panties in your laundry basket to know who's being screwed. Nor does the absence of a mushroom cloud mean that a nuclear meltdown isn't imminent. Unfortunately in this instance, waiting for the validation of a confession could be hazardous to your health.